What can parents do about the rising drop out rates?

America’s drops out rates are still rising and African American youth have still have the highest drop rates.  Students reasons for dropping out of high school are they don’t have a sense of belonging, classes are not interesting, they are not motivated and simply don’t have incentive enough to try.  Parents are not involved in helping these young people and keeping them motivated enough to keep trying.  Parent involvement in keep and starts from the time our children are infants.  There are ways parents can keep children in school. 

A child does not decide to drop out of school overnight.  Usually, it’s something he or she has been thinking about for a while.  As a parent, you can take steps to prevent your child from dropping out.  But it’s important to start early.  Your child is never too young to be encouraged, listened to and loved. 

For parents who have infants and toddlers be a good role model.  Your baby learns by watching you.  It is important to hold and hug your child often, as it is good for both of you.  A healthy baby has a head start on learning.  It is important that your child learns to eat a healthy diet even in infancy.  You are helping your child develop life long habits.  Most importantly, you need to be a model for reading.  Make books available in the house.  You can purchase plastic and hard cardboard books so your child can touch and manipulate.  Lastly, read to our child everyday and let him see you reading, and he will mimic you.

If you have preschoolers, you can teach your child about the world around you go to the grocery store, part, museums, and library together.  Don’t be in a hurry.  Give your child time to learn and grow.  Turn the television off and give your child a picture book, coloring book, and drawing paper. Let your child help with simple tasks like putting toys and clothes away.  Talk to your preschooler, congratulate and applaud any small accomplishment.  You are providing them with opportunities to feel successful. 

Parent with children in kindergarten through third grade can be active in the child’s school.  Make sure your child goes every day.  Make going to school habitual.  Get to know the teachers and talk to them about your child regularly.  Continue reading to your child and ask her to read to you.  Make sure your child has plenty of playtime with other children and learns to share.  Always make time to listen, its one of the most important things you can do.  And again applaud your child for the small things he does.  You are still providing them with opportunities to know what success feels like. 

When your child is in fourth to eighth grade you need to remain actively involved.  Ask about your child’s day at school and ask about homework.  Be ready with praise for a job well done.  We build our children’s self esteem by applauding them for their accomplishments, no matter how small or large.  Make sure that homework is done and correct.  Meet your child’s friends and supervise them carefully as they interact with your child.  Visit the school often and if you think there’s a problem at school, talk to the teachers and principal immediately. 

If your child is in high school, you are not finished yet.  High school students need as much monitoring and motivation as younger children.  Make sure that school comes first with your child.  Don’t allow him to miss school.  Check his attendance and homework.  Ask about classwork.  Praise his for even the small successes.  Listen when your high schooler talks about the school day.  Help your teenager balance school, work, and social life.  Ask about her dreams and her goals.  Show your teenager the connection between school and reaching those goals.  Teenagers need space, but make sure they know that you’re always there for them. 

Remember, a child who loves learning will learn to love school.  Help your child.  Read, explain, and take every teachable moment.  Take every moment as an opportunity to teach your child that a good education is a sure way to a better life.  As a parent, it is our responsibility to make sure that our children do not become one of the million students who drop out of school every year in America.  We have a responsibility and we cannot drop the ball until our children are successful. 

Age

The “gift” of a time and times way past
Hopefully I will be the person I always wanted to be.
I don’t mean have the body I always wanted to have for that didn’t last
The wrinkles in my face and the dark under my eyes everyone can see
The not so easy to disguise once firm butt
The rounded waistline that they call my gut

The “gift” of a time and times past
“Who is that person looking at me!” I screamed
When I looked in my mirror this morning I saw her fast
“Who is that person looking back at me?” I beamed
Who is that who looks like my mother and granny
When did I grow so careful, watchful and canny.

I might want to trade a few friends and parts of this amazing life
I might think about cashing in my some of my loving family
I could get rid of a few gray hairs and a bit of the strife
I wish I could still strut more irresistible and fancily
Phew, this is a gift? I guess it is if I look at it right
If am less cynical and more kind to myself I might see a different light

I've become my own friend as I enjoy this gift
I chide my self less for the extra pounds and stuff
I don’t feel guilty for not making the bed if you get my drift
I even treat the kids as if I was less tough
I now have no guilt for spending an extra dollar or two
Don’t care much either about the couple of hundred I blew

Too many good friends and family have left this earth too soon
Some got a chance to enjoy the freedom that comes with age
Some didn’t even get a chance to enjoy their grandchildren bloom
Others couldn’t image the ease that comes with this stage
I am glad I got a chance to feel this feeling
I would jump for joy but I have difficulty even kneeling

It is nobody’s business that I watch TV till the dawn of day
Who cares what they say when I choose to sit for hours
I finally don’t give a poot what any one has to say
Just because I am older doesn’t mean I have to start planting flowers
I might choose to sleep with books, paper, and pen in my bed all night again
And wait for the funds my son and daughter told me they’d send

I still like to dance to movin tunes of a classic R & B jam song
One might even make me weep over a love forever lost back flash
Sometimes I forget what I said in just a moment too long
I can hardly walk some mornings less known run too fast
I am not ashamed to sit on the lake in a swimsuit and shawl
It may be stretched over my bulging flesh and all

I don’t care anymore if others pity me
Surly over the years my heart has been broken.
A heart not broken can’t experience the joy of being set free
My tongue can hold the things that don’t have to be spoken
I hope I have strength, courage, understanding, and compassion
And too, to my loved ones, my love I don’t have to ration

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray
I am so blessed to find it easier to be the positive one
I am so blessed to have earned the right to choose to go or stay
I don’t question myself anymore and I feel good about who I have become
I am still here living and paying no mind to what could have been
I don’t worry about what will be except of course the evil and angry men

The “gift” of a time and times way past is large
I think I am the person I always wanted to be.
Nurtured and nurturing as I was given charge
Giving and grateful and forgiving with a heart strong as a tree
Favored and blessed and creating and comforted and Him I obey
Faithful and dignified and honorable and loved and skilled at keeping sin at bay
 
Reprinted from:  She Speaks Psalms ISBN 1-60813-056-8; Though She Speaks Psalms incorporates affirmations of God and spirituality, the work is more social and political than it is religious in its portrayal of life and its difficulties.

But, How do I Let it Go?

I have been told many times that I need to learn how to let it go but nobody could tell me HOW to let go.  I wanted to let go.  I knew that if I didn't let go I'd cry a whole lot longer than I wanted to cry.  I knew letting go was the right thing to do, but I just didn't know how.  I was told I wanted to hold on to the bad stuff but honestly, I needed someone to tell me what steps to take to let go.  Unfortunately no one could instead they did one of three things, stared at me in disbelief, got angry and insulted me, or laughed.  I guess I wasn't born with this kind of intelligence.   I was sincere, this was not my kind of smart.  I have learned that no questions is a stupid or bad question and I know that someone else out there has the same problem of letting go that I do.   I saw folks move on as act like they weren't hurt or angry.  I really couldn't do it so easitly.  I was one who lived within the confines of "time heals all things."  Well sometimes, it took too much time.  So, without help from the people who told me to let it go, I created my own process for letting go.  Guess what?  It worked,  as I went through this process a few times, I felt myself beginning to let go.  I could literally feel the pain and heart ache or the anger and bittterness go.  This is what I did because I was tired of crying and feeling badly.  The first time I did, I didn't take note of the process I was creating for myself.  After a few times, I began to take mental not of what I was doing, eventually I was able to go through the process and write it down.  When I was done, I felt so much better.   Here are the steps I took. 

1. I began by lying down comfortably on my bed, sometimes I'd lie on my couch, yoga a mat, or blanket on the floor. I supportted my head on a pillow or a folded blanket so that my neck and throat were soft and relaxed.

2. I then positioned a pillow or blanket under my knees in order to support my  knees and to stretch and relax my spine.

3. I closed my eyes and released my shoulders away from my neck and allowed my arms and my legs to rest slightly away from my body.  The first time I did this step a little differently but I couldn't remember exactly what I did here so I created another way.

4. I kept my eyes closed but don't force them shut too tightly.  Next, I began to breathe softly and naturally. I focus my  mind on Jesus and his love for his people and remembered he said he came to bring me back to The Father.  I took it personally, this was all about me and how I had to learn to trust him for real.  In a short time the relaxing sensations from him flowing through my  body began to permeate me.  I felt like The Most High was releasing  warm and nurturing breathes from my head to my toe. The deep and slow breathing flowed into every part of my  body causing me to feel less pain, stress, and tension from the challenge I was facing in life.  The breathing is similar to the breathing in meditation or yoga class.

5. I followed my  breath with my  mind as it flowed into my  chest, my shoulders, my  arms. I allowed the breath to go into my  arms.

6. I repeated the words from one of my favorite gospel songs.  "My Creator  is greater than my pain, my problem".   I repeated that and this, "He is greater than the stress and challenges I am  facing right now. I forced myself not to  think about anything but the things that were right and good in my  life. I thought about how blessed I was.  I learned to be content. as I thought about 100 things that I could thank God for at that moment.  As I went through my list I began to praise God  while I continued to take deep breaths.  I  praised Him for his goodness, his mercy, and his lovingkindness. As I praised him I began to cry.  But this time the tears were different.  I felt the agony I was going through being released.  I felt  like I was actually beginning to know what it was like to "let go and let God."

7. The breaths I took caused  a softness and an openness in the palms of my hands. The breaths and the praising made me want to open my  hands.  I let the breathe flow down into my fingers and out.  I felt like now I was in charge instead of my anger or my hurt.  I felt the bitter that was building inside of me, subside. After a few of these sessions with me and my God.  I could feel the bitterness leave and peace enter. 

8. I followed  my  breathes  into my  hips, through my legs and into my feet.  I was able to let go of the tension, the pain, and the problem down through my legss.  I let it go into my feet.

9. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go, I repeated to myself.  As I breathed I received each breathe as a gift of healing life and the life force from God.

10. I opened my mind to new life from God's energy flowing through my body. I visualized God's greatness and my blessings as gentle streams of God's goodness.  I thought about Psalms 136 and was going to read it when I finished breathing and praising.

11. I could feel my body being healed, renewed, and restored as I imagined God sending  positive energy penetrating from deep within my core into each layer of my body.  He was healing me.

12. I let my mind become silent of everything except praises to God. I rested in this place of praise until I could feel a smile in your heart and  on your face. Visualize your heart, your body healed and whole, supported by God. Let it go. Give it to him and don't pick it back up. 

13. You may remain in deep relaxation as long as you are comfortable. When  I was ready, I began to move my  body, gently and lovingly, so that that  I didn't disturb the healing that had taken place.  I didn't want to feel anything esle. It felt good. 

14. After a while, I slowly rolled over onto my  side and came to a comfortable seated position  I was smiling from deep down as I fell into a deep and restful sleep.  Each time I took myself through this "letting go " process I felt my smile widen and my peace deepen.

15. I literally felt my burden lifted, I saw my healing. After the most perfect nap I opened my  palms and lifted my hands in praise.

16.  I honor Jesus as my  source of healing and I thank him. I experienced a renewed source of energy and healing from God after I was done. 

I began taking myself through this "letting go" process in 2008, and I am still smiling.  Sometimes when I go through the process I play whatever music suits my fancy in the background, whether it be soft and slow gospel music, harps, or other instrumentals.  It's almost 2012 and I still feel at peace.

You Reap What You Sow

Give, because God has given to you. Not only that, but he has even more in store for his servants. I thought I would share this message that is designed as a tool for self-motivated with someone who may also benefit. When I opened my email the other day I gained pleasure in two emails from folks I don't know. As I re-read them this morming I am encourged.

They commented on words of encouragement I gave to others in several blogs I'd written. The funny thing is that the Lord moved these people to send encouraging comments on day when I needed encouragement. You see, I have learned to live by the biblical concept that "you reap what you sow." I have also learned by experience that what good I sow will be reaped in my life at a time, like today, when I need it most.

On the other hand, it also my experience that whatever bad I have sown, I will probably reap it when it is most inconvenient or a time when it will be most painful. Because of the encouragement I received from others whom I have encouraged Again, I have an renewed attitude of gratitude.

Additionally, as I enter another stage of life, while I can, I strive to instill in my children ideas, concepts, and tools that I know they will need as they go about to make a way for themselves in this world. One of the tools I know they will certainly need is the ability to be self-motivated by their own grattitude. Today, I am blessed because I am happy. The joy and peace of my Lord and Savior has overcome me. Today, too, will be a good day because I am thankful and because of Jesus, I am not alone. I can accomplish all that I desire becaise my mind is on the mighty God who strengthens me. I pray you also have a happy today.

Don't forget to utilize the tools for shedding extra pounds and for feeling good while doing so. Find a partner to practice these stay healthy tips with and to share weight loss goals and accomplishments. Motivate someone who needs motivating. Give somebody something they need. Share a smile with someone who needs to smile, they will feel like you touched them. Share the information with others and spread the joy that Jesus is ready to give you today. Jesus said that the second greatest commandment was, love thy neighbor as thyself." When you do this, I guarantee you that feelings of loneliness, thoughts of woe, and depression will ease up off of you. Plus, let me tell you this, you will find and ease to your financial lack. When I focus on helping others, no matter how big or small, when I give from my heart, I get whatever it is I need. It usually comes from an unexpected source.

Give joy, give encouragement, give help to someone who needs it. In return God will bless you with a peaceful smile on your face that comes from deep within your soul and is better than any smile put there by any male or female man. Certainly, this is some powerful stuff!  Tap into the power of "you reap what you sow." I find it rewarding and fulfilling.

Move it.....Move it.....Move it......

Breathe
In, two, three, four,
Out, two, three, four.

In, two, three, four,
Out, two, three, four.

Don't have time to exercise today? Got at least 10 minutes? Try this quick and easy daily power walk to get your metabolism moving.

First, warm up your body and wake up your metabolism when you first get up in the morning. Begin with a couple of diaphragmatic breaths: Inhale deeply to the count of 1; hold the breath to the cound of 4; then exhale to the count of 2. Breath in this manner for 3-5 minutes.

Next, inhale through your nose to the count of 4 and exhale to the count of 4 through your mouth. Repeat this breathwalk for 5 minutes continuously.

The Power Walk. This is a tidbit I got from the step aerobics class I took. It is perfect for folks like me who hate exercise. The idea of being in a gym with 20 or more other sweaty souls mimicing exercising and listening to a slim, good looking, physically fit instructor count for me and say, "good", "alright now", "here we go", "one more set", "that's it", "good job"; just doesn't sit well with me. I just don't get anything out of it. I can hardly wait until its over. I prefer to do something more meaningingful, like riding my bike, skating, or dancing.

On those days when I just don't feel like exercising or when I am too busy to do what I like as far as exercise is concerned, I have adapted the Power Walk. I find it to be very beneficial in getting my metabolism moving and burning calories that would otherwise be stored as fat. I can feel the burning sensation in my limbs. It is magnificent. The Power Walk even aids in keeping my mood happy and vibrant for the day.

For best results, experts suggest you hit the floor moving in the morning. They suggest you put on your walking clothes and shoes and hit the door immediately. Go outside in the open air and in order to warm up your body and wake up your metabolim. Take in a few deep breaths; inhale to the count of one...hold the breath to the count of four...then exhale to the count of two. NEXT, a for the next five minutes of your walk, inhale four quick breaths and exhale four quick breaths. That's all you need to do, I am usually ready to walk a bit longer after this effective pick me up. Try it. You will like.

An early morning power walk outside in the "fresh" air feels freakin fantastic.  As you can see I like that phrase "freakin fantastic".  I got it off of the movie Mirror Has Two Faces with Barbara Streisand.  It's a really good movie you gotta rent it.  I have it on my favorite movie shelf.  When are you going to start your power walks? 

For more information on the power walk go to: www.breathwalk.com or ask your doctor and exercise instructor.  Remember to always consult your health care practitioner before starting any weight loss or exercise program.  It's just smart business.

Do you empower others? It's hard isn't it? Give yourself a boost.

Support for Those who Empower Others

Many of us work with others in social service settings where we are required to help our clients with issues regarding self-esteem and self-worth. As we know, these are key to improving the quality of life. This posr contains tips for helping those who we empower to increase their esteem, learn to appreciate their value, and improve relationships, thus; the first step to improving the quality of their lives. Since we are also humans with human problems we sometimes need a boost.  It is perfectly normal and okay.
How to Get More Out of a Relationship That You Value

Self Esteem is about self reflection, action, and reaction. Do you keep getting in relationships where it seems as if you're being taken for granted--where you give, and you give, but get little or nothing in return? Are you beginning to wonder why people keep treating you this way? If so, you are probably also feeling pretty confused, sad, and are beginning to lose what little confidence you had in yourself.

It can be very hard to maintain your self esteem and self confidence when you receive little appreciation and it seems as if the other person just doesn't care. Read on and discover a three-step self-esteem lesson plan for creating love and respect in all your relationships.

Are you in a relationship where you think you're being used, and not appreciated? Are you beginning to think that you must be doing something that gives the impression that you are not worth making an effort for--that you are perceived as the one who meets needs without requiring any reciprocal effort to meet yours as well?

If so, your self-esteem is probably at a low point and you are bound to feel less than confident. This scenario creates a vicious cycle-- low self-esteem creates how you feel-- how you feel creates how you act and in turn how others react to you. Now is the time to stop this vicious cycle by breaking the chain of your low self-esteem. How then is this great feat accomplished?

The very first thing to do if your esteem is not what it needs to be is to treat yourself as worthy. Love yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for what you want from others. Loving and accepting yourself is the first step to creating relationships of mutual respect and consideration.

Next, learn the three beginning steps below; they will help you practice self-love and are guaranteed to increase your self-esteem. By practicing these self-love techniques you will automatically start treating yourself as the worthy being that is your true nature. And in turn, so will others.

Explore Your Thinking

Secondly, whether you're aware of it or not, the thoughts that you think generate the way you feel about yourself and how you treat others. The way you feel about yourself governs the actions you take, which in turn creates your life and your problems and your successes and your challenges.

Most of us have been raised in cultures that teach us to focus only on what's happening in our environment. When you always focus on what's going on "out there", it's very challenging to really know what's going on "in here"--to know yourself and understand what's most important to you. If this is the case, then whenever something happens "out there" that you don't enjoy, all you know to do is try to and change your external circumstances. This is hopeless because the only thing you truly have control over is your internal reactions to your external circumstances.  The only thing you have control over is you.

To practice this step, I suggest you start by exploring your "low self-esteem" thinking. You begin by using your feelings as an alarm. The next time you feel uncomfortable in any way, try to identify what you were thinking about just before you started feeling uncomfortable. Thoughts are spirit and negative spirits creep in when you harbor a negative thought too long. 

Identify What is Most Important to You

The 3rd step that helps to increase self-esteem is to discover what's most important to you? What do you value most? What is so important to you that's missing in a particular situation and making you feel the way you feel? This will help you discover who you truly are. There are values are hidden beneath your everyday actions, reactions, and feelings. For example, underneath a sense of deep sadness, you might discover caring and consideration are very important to you. Caring and consideration might be missing in your life. What is hidden beneath your anger? What is hidden behind your feelings of helplessness? What is hidden beneath your depression? What is hidden beneath your feelings of nervousness? Go deep beneath your feelings and find out what you value. Upon reflection and deep investigation of yourself, you will find wonderful qualities that you can enjoy and learn to love, making it easier for others to love you the way you want to be loved.

Enjoy Your Own Company

Finally, take steps to appreciate who you are. Although at times you may feel very lonely. You can learn to stop feelings of loneliness at its onset. The very first moment you start to feel uncomfortable, the thing to do is to turn your thoughts to what is most important to you beneath your feelings. This will help you to appreciate YOU. You can appreciate that you are someone who desires caring and consideration. You can appreciate that you are someone who values understanding and effectiveness. Aren't these the qualities that you appreciate in others?

Self-esteem is all about self-love. Using the self-love techniques, you are guaranteed to find the best friend you’ve ever had, and will be well on our way to mastering the art of self-love and acceptance, especially when you  begin to feel lonely. With practice you gain the confidence to begin asking for what you want in all our relationships and never settle for less than you want again.

Knowing clearly what you  value makes it much easier to identify when it is missing and figure out how to get it. This is the surest path we know of to get the love and respect you  want in all your relationships. Understanding yourself and taking steps to build your own esteem, you will find that you will break the cycle of mistreatment, abuse, and unhappiness in relationships with family, friends, co-workers, as well as your mate.

Love yourself, how can you tell others how to love you if you don't know how to love yourself.  Be careful though, you  don't want to become self absorbed.  It's not only about you it's about others.  You have to find that perfect balance. 

The Purple Rose is Available on Amazon. Keyword: Michelle R. Yisrael

You know what I love?

I love having options!  I love being able to choose for myself.  I love the fact that I do what I do daily because it is what I choose and not what someone is forcing me to do.  Have you every been under the "control" of someone?  It feels uncomfortable, intimidating, and irritating.  Sometimes you may even feel afraid and the worse thing is that you're not even sure what you are afraid of.  It's not a good feeling at all.  Being free from "control" is liberating.  The funny thing is that, guess what?  I choose to live the same lifestyle as the one who tried to "control" me pushed and forced and insulted me and didn't trust me.  Only, I do it better!   The Lord said he hated divorce, as a matter of fact most of us do too, but  he didn't say it didn't need to happen nor did he say it wan't going to happen.  Well guess what?   "Shit happens!", It's just life.  Sometimes bad things, things that are taboo,  unspeakable things, they do happen and very often we become better when it happens. 

I love not having to alter my personality or my opinion or my views and even my plans to fit someone else's when they don't appreciate my efforts.  I love not having to be frustrated with having perfectly normal questions or being asked questions that makes me feel prodded and violated and accused.  By the way, what is it that I am being of accused of anyway?  "Silly Rabbit"  I could never figure that out.  Isn't it wonderful, I don't have to try to figure it out anymore and I freakin LOVE it! And, why all the "extra" rules, the rules that make me feel uncomfortable and irritated but the maker feel empowered?   Why all the extra rules?  Why aren't God's rules enough for us to live by?    I love not being in a position of feeling someone is intentionally trying to wear me down or beat me down  in order to make me give in to their whims and fearful persuasion.  You don't have to force me into submission.  I love to submit to that which is good, healthy, true, and right.   I love having the right to freely make my own decisions and choose what is truth.  I love not feeling intimidated and panicky, and unsettled, and demoralized.   I love trusting my own feelings and being honest with myself.  I love not being afraid to reach out to others whom  I trust with my emotional needs. 

You know what I love?  I love being me.  I love being an educator, though it's draining sometimes.   I love being a mother, though watching my children make mistakes is painful.   I love being a wife, though next time he has to be a kind and loving man of God.  I love to sing though I'm no Diva.   I love having a clean house, though it is not always so.   I love having the choice of good healthy food readily available to nourish me and my children.   I love having shelves and shelves of my own books to read on a variety of subjects. I love being a writer who works in education and being respected for my work.  I love not feeling like I have to look for love but it will be sent to me.   I love listening to good music.  I love to dance.  I love praising God. I love trusting The True and Living God for my everything.   I love to hug. I love to smile.  I love to touch.  I love going here, or there, or anywhere and  even nowhere as the spirit moves me.   I  love spending my valuable time with people I love.  You know what else I love?  I love the Lord's Sabbath days.  I love taking long hot baths in the dark with scented candles and lots of bubbles that smell good, though the motor is burnt out on my whirlpool.  I love laughing with my friends and my sisters and my cousins, the one brother I have and his wife.  You see I love to laugh, and I love to  laugh a lot.  I love to write poetry, and short stories, and curriculum designs and informative articles.  Guess what else?  I am writing my first novel.  Isn't that exciting!  

You know what I love?  I love to inspire.  I love being inspired.  I love sharing.  I love giving.  I love NOT crying and feeling poorly.  I love receiving love and complements and gifts and of course money.  Who doesn't love receiving money?  I love watching my children make good choices and enjoying their lives in a clean way that will make God look at them favorably.  I love reading God's word for comfort and for understanding and for inspiration and for information and even to laugh.  I love not thinking about other's random opinions of me.  I love the idea of, me, walking in the streets of Jerusalem, on the streets of gold in my bare feet, in a city being built by my God right now.  I love seeing the back of Jesus as we come with him for the battle.  I love the idea of seeing that great city come down out of heaven as I read in my bible.  I love being able to have another day to secure my spot in that place that warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes.  I hope I make it.

You know what I love?  I love being me.  It feels freakin fantastic!