You know what I love?

I love having options!  I love being able to choose for myself.  I love the fact that I do what I do daily because it is what I choose and not what someone is forcing me to do.  Have you every been under the "control" of someone?  It feels uncomfortable, intimidating, and irritating.  Sometimes you may even feel afraid and the worse thing is that you're not even sure what you are afraid of.  It's not a good feeling at all.  Being free from "control" is liberating.  The funny thing is that, guess what?  I choose to live the same lifestyle as the one who tried to "control" me pushed and forced and insulted me and didn't trust me.  Only, I do it better!   The Lord said he hated divorce, as a matter of fact most of us do too, but  he didn't say it didn't need to happen nor did he say it wan't going to happen.  Well guess what?   "Shit happens!", It's just life.  Sometimes bad things, things that are taboo,  unspeakable things, they do happen and very often we become better when it happens. 

I love not having to alter my personality or my opinion or my views and even my plans to fit someone else's when they don't appreciate my efforts.  I love not having to be frustrated with having perfectly normal questions or being asked questions that makes me feel prodded and violated and accused.  By the way, what is it that I am being of accused of anyway?  "Silly Rabbit"  I could never figure that out.  Isn't it wonderful, I don't have to try to figure it out anymore and I freakin LOVE it! And, why all the "extra" rules, the rules that make me feel uncomfortable and irritated but the maker feel empowered?   Why all the extra rules?  Why aren't God's rules enough for us to live by?    I love not being in a position of feeling someone is intentionally trying to wear me down or beat me down  in order to make me give in to their whims and fearful persuasion.  You don't have to force me into submission.  I love to submit to that which is good, healthy, true, and right.   I love having the right to freely make my own decisions and choose what is truth.  I love not feeling intimidated and panicky, and unsettled, and demoralized.   I love trusting my own feelings and being honest with myself.  I love not being afraid to reach out to others whom  I trust with my emotional needs. 

You know what I love?  I love being me.  I love being an educator, though it's draining sometimes.   I love being a mother, though watching my children make mistakes is painful.   I love being a wife, though next time he has to be a kind and loving man of God.  I love to sing though I'm no Diva.   I love having a clean house, though it is not always so.   I love having the choice of good healthy food readily available to nourish me and my children.   I love having shelves and shelves of my own books to read on a variety of subjects. I love being a writer who works in education and being respected for my work.  I love not feeling like I have to look for love but it will be sent to me.   I love listening to good music.  I love to dance.  I love praising God. I love trusting The True and Living God for my everything.   I love to hug. I love to smile.  I love to touch.  I love going here, or there, or anywhere and  even nowhere as the spirit moves me.   I  love spending my valuable time with people I love.  You know what else I love?  I love the Lord's Sabbath days.  I love taking long hot baths in the dark with scented candles and lots of bubbles that smell good, though the motor is burnt out on my whirlpool.  I love laughing with my friends and my sisters and my cousins, the one brother I have and his wife.  You see I love to laugh, and I love to  laugh a lot.  I love to write poetry, and short stories, and curriculum designs and informative articles.  Guess what else?  I am writing my first novel.  Isn't that exciting!  

You know what I love?  I love to inspire.  I love being inspired.  I love sharing.  I love giving.  I love NOT crying and feeling poorly.  I love receiving love and complements and gifts and of course money.  Who doesn't love receiving money?  I love watching my children make good choices and enjoying their lives in a clean way that will make God look at them favorably.  I love reading God's word for comfort and for understanding and for inspiration and for information and even to laugh.  I love not thinking about other's random opinions of me.  I love the idea of, me, walking in the streets of Jerusalem, on the streets of gold in my bare feet, in a city being built by my God right now.  I love seeing the back of Jesus as we come with him for the battle.  I love the idea of seeing that great city come down out of heaven as I read in my bible.  I love being able to have another day to secure my spot in that place that warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes.  I hope I make it.

You know what I love?  I love being me.  It feels freakin fantastic!